給驕傲者的建言

根據職場研究調查，為什麼有權位的人會不願意接受建議，原因常是對自己的判斷過於有自信，而過於自信常是驕傲的特質之一，他們相信沒有人比他們更聰明。此外很多商場和專業人士都因為害怕被認為自己很「弱」－不足以勝任他們的職務，而不願意向人求助。他們認為自己必須要掌握每一件事。你遇過這樣的人嗎？

有趣的是，研究發現女人比男人更容易接受別人的建議。似乎，男人在攀登企業的升職階梯時，隨著他們越來越有權力，他們也越來越驕傲。有自信是好的，它會幫助我們在追求目標時有效率。然而，過度自信卻會導致災難性的自我膨脹和魯莽。

也許女人天生的直覺中就知道人有健忘的特質，所以她們比較會聽別人的建議。但其實我們不需要天生的直覺，因為聰明的人會聽別人的建議，尤其是在決定一些重要的事上。聖經也不斷告訴我們，要聽別人的建議，可以避免下列情形：

前面突然出現的危險。「我已經做出決定了！不要再跟我提那些數字和資料了！」我們有時用這樣的方式來決定我們想要做的事和做事的方法，即便是員工、同工告訴我們一個完全相反的事實。箴言12章15節告訴我們：『愚妄人所行的，在自己眼中看為正直；惟智慧人肯聽人的勸教。』

單獨行動的問題。「驕傲」是我們大家都經歷過的掙扎。我們堅持自己不需要別人的支持和幫助。不幸的是，驕傲導致失敗，甚至是災難。這就是為什麼傳道書4章10-11節告訴我們：『若是跌倒，這人可以扶起他的同伴；若是孤身跌倒，沒有別人扶起他來，這人就有禍了。再者，二人同睡就都暖和，一人獨睡怎能暖和呢？』

信任他人得獎賞。我們尋求別人的建議時，他們不會總說我們想聽的。但是聽聽看別人從不同角度看同一件事，或是解決問題的不同方法，可能會帶來更好的結果。『無智謀，民就敗落；謀士多，人便安居。』(箴言11章4節) 『不先商議，所謀無效；謀士眾多，所謀乃成。』(箴言15章22節)

在共同的異象中同工的能力。諺語告訴我們：「眾志成城」。與人合作的價值，就是分享經驗和才幹。又要彼此相顧，激發愛心，勉勵行善。『你們不可停止聚會，好像那些停止慣了的人，倒要彼此勸勉，既知道（原文是看見）那日子臨近，就更當如此。』(希伯來書10章24-25節)

版權所有2011,純全資料中心。本文摘錄自「與Rick Boxx的純全時刻」，這是一本從基督徒角度看職場議題的評論集。想知道更多關於純全資料中心的資訊，請上網訂閱Rick Boxx的每日純全時刻。www.integrityresource.org. 他的書How to prosper in business without sacrificing intergrity也提供了如何純全做生意合乎聖經原則的教導。

The reason for their reluctance to accept counsel, according to the authors of the workplace study, was overconfidence in their own judgment, a trait often known as arrogance. “No one is as smart as I am,” they believe. In other instances, some business and professional people in leadership roles are reluctant to ask others for counsel or help, fearing they might be regarded as “weak” or inadequate to fulfill their appointed responsibilities. They feel they must be in control. Have you ever met people like this?

Interestingly, this study also discovered that women were more likely to take advice than men. It seems that men, as they climb the corporate ladder and become more powerful, grow in arrogance and self-assurance. Confidence is good – we all need it to pursue our goals and responsibilities effectively. However, overconfidence often results in disastrous self-reliance, even recklessness.

Perhaps many women intuitively know what men are more inclined to forget: That a wise person still listens to advice. However, we do not require strong intuition to understand the need to consult others for advice and wisdom on key decisions. The Bible affirms this repeatedly. Here are some examples:

The peril of plunging ahead. “I have made up my mind. Do not confuse me with the facts!” Sometimes we take this approach to decision-making, determined to do what we want, the way we want to do it, even though employees, coworkers and peers might advise us to do otherwise. Proverbs 12:15 describes this scenario: "The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice."

The problem of acting in isolation. Pride is a problem we all struggle with, in one way or another. Often it is pride that insists we have no need for the support or assistance of others. Unfortunately, this can result in failure, even disaster. This is why Ecclesiastes 4:10-11 makes this observation: “If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?“

The prize of trusting in others. When we consult others for advice, they might not always tell us what we want to hear. But different perspectives, as well as hearing alternatives solutions to the problems we must address, could bring about far better results. “For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers make victory sure” (Proverbs 11:14). “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed” (Proverbs 15:22).

The power of working in shared mission. There is strength in numbers, the adage reminds us, and there truly is great value in working with others, sharing talents and experiences for a common goal. “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together…but let us encourage one another…” (Hebrews 10:24-25).