Thursday, March 28, 2024

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葡萄樹傳媒

接受錯誤決定的後果

By Ken Korkow

當生活中的事情似乎亂成一團,完全失控,應該怪誰?我從經驗學到,大部份的混亂是我自己造成的。這對你而言,也是實情。放諸四海,每個人都要為他們自己生活中的混亂負責--不是全部,但是其中的大部份。

然而在我們所住的世界中,人們常常把他們的狀況怪罪別人--父母、員工、環境、社會、境遇。但實際上,當事情出錯,而我們想知道原因時,我們唯一需要做的事是照鏡子。

例如,若你買了一輛車,但後來卻又不喜歡那車。是你決定買那車,不論原因是什麼--而且在決定的過程中,訂出了維修時間表,那時間表可能造成你的麻煩。

對那些愈來愈不滿意自己婚姻的人而言,是他們自己決定說「我願意」,才在法律上與他們的配偶結合,並且定下了另一種形式的「維修時間表」,那時間表可能讓他們覺得幻滅或失望。

你是否曾經在你的工作中覺得不快樂?要知道是你自己決定去那裡工作--而且接受、影響、或允許一些狀況發生,造成你不安、不快樂和不滿意的感覺。

一次又一次,我學到大部份我必須處理的痛苦和挑戰性後果,都是我之前錯誤決定的結果。我能怎麼辦呢?雖然我無法改變過去,但我現在會從開始就作更好的決定。

我們要如何學會作更好的決定,以造就一個更好的未來?有許多方式可嘗試,但我已發現最好的方式是每天勤於讀聖經。在每天讀經中,我看到以下提供真知灼見的經文:

耶穌告訴祂的跟隨者:「你們為甚麼稱呼我『主啊,主啊』卻不遵我的話行呢?凡到我這裏來,聽見我的話就去行的,我要告訴你們他像甚麼人:他像一個人蓋房子,深深地挖地,把根基安在磐石上;到發大水的時候,水沖那房子,房子總不能搖動,因為根基立在磐石上。惟有聽見不去行的,就像一個人在土地上蓋房子,沒有根基;水一沖,隨即倒塌了,並且那房子壞的很大」(路加福音6章46-49節)。

我常聽人們說:「極端愚蠢是一再地做同樣的事情,卻期待有不同的結果。」若你對自己所處的狀況非常滿意--那麼就留在那軌道上。但若你正經歷不滿意,或甚至痛苦,那麼我建議你對聖經,上帝的話,更深入地挖掘,你就可以照祂所說的話去做。我發現因為我們是祂所設計的,所以祂知道我們要如何才能運作得最好--而且祂會按照祂為我們的設計指示我們的路。上帝是我們的天父,祂真知道什麼是最好的。

肯恩.寇克住在美國內布拉斯加州的Omaha市,在那裡他擔任CBMC的區域總幹事。本篇文章改編自他每週寫的「生活傳真」專欄。我們獲得允許轉載。

省思 / 討論題目
本文作者說,當我們的生活混亂、失控時,大部份的情況要怪自己。你是否同意?為什麼? 你是否認識有人對於自己錯誤決定所造成問題,拒絕承擔任何責任?依照你的觀點,這些人是怎樣的人? 作者建議對未來要作出更好的決定,可從聖經中得到指引和幫助。你對此有何看法? 老實說,你對於聖經教導的原則和真理,是否完全聽從,並應用在你每天的所有情況中,尤其是應用在職場中?請解釋。註:若你有聖經且想要看有關此主題的其他經文,請看:
耶利米書33章3節;以弗所書2章10節;歌羅西書3章16-17、23節;提摩太後書3章16-17節;雅各書1章5-8節

ACCEPTING CONSEQUENCES OF POOR DECISIONS
By Ken Korkow

When things in life seem to be going crazy, out of control, who is to blame? Experience has taught me that I create most of my own chaos. And this is true for you, too. Universally, individuals are responsible for most of the turmoil in their own lives – not all of it, but much of it.

We live in a world where, more often than not, people want to shift blame for their circumstances onto someone or something else – parents, employers, environment, society, circumstances. But in reality, when things go wrong for us and we want to know why, all we need to do is look in the mirror.

For instance, what if you bought a car and decided you do not like it? You are the one that chose to buy it for whatever reasons – and in the decision-making process created the maintenance schedule that might have become problematic for you.

For people that have grown dissatisfied with their marriages, they are the ones that decided to say “yes” to legally unite with their spouse – and created another kind of “maintenance schedule” that might have left them disillusioned or disappointed.

Have you ever felt unhappy in your job? Realize that you decided to work there – and accepted, influenced, or have allowed conditions that have contributed to your feelings of unrest, unhappiness and dissatisfaction.

Again and again I have learned that most of the painful and challenging consequences I have had to deal with generally were a result of my previous wrong or poor decisions. What can I do about it? Although I cannot change the past, I now try to make better decisions from the start.

How do we learn to make better decisions to shape a better, more appealing future? There are many ways to try, but I have found the very best way is by diligently reading my Bible every day. During these daily readings, I came across the following passage that offers special insight:

Jesus told His followers, "Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and not do what I tell you? Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it, immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great" (Luke 6:46-49).

I often hear it said, "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results." If you are absolutely content with where you are – then stay on that track. But if you are experiencing areas of discontent or even suffering, I suggest you dig deeply into the Bible, the Word of God, so you will do what He says to do. I have found that since He designed us, He knows how we function best – and instructs us accordingly. God is the Father who truly does know best.

Ken Korkow lives in Omaha, Nebraska, U.S.A., where he serves as an area director for CBMC. This is adapted from the “Fax of Life” column that he writes each week. Used with permission.

Reflection/Discussion Questions
Do you agree with Mr. Korkow”s statement that when our lives are chaotic, seemingly out of control, in most cases we are the persons to blame? Why or why not? Have you known any people that refuse to take any personal responsibility for problems or wrong decisions? What are these people like, from your perspective? What do you think of the recommendation to turn to the Bible for guidance and assistance in making better decisions concerning the future? Being honest, how good are you at listening to and applying principles and truths taught in the Bible to your everyday situations, especially in the workplace? Explain your answer.NOTE: If you have a Bible and would like to review some other passages that relate to this topic, consider the following verses: Jeremiah 33:3; Ephesians 2:10; Colossians 3:16-17, 23; 2 Timothy 3:16-17; James 1:5-8

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