成為一個有正面影響力的人
By Jim Langley
幾年前，我參加了CBMC大會，主講人是埃爾莫爾(Tim Elmore)博士，他是一個暢銷書作家、國際級講員，以及「領導者養成Growing Leaders」機構的總裁和創始人，這是一個幫助新興領導者的非營利組織。他們相信每個人天生都具有領導才能。埃爾莫爾博士提出了他認為在培養領袖的過程中重要的九項原則。我覺得我們都應該思考這些原則，因為我們都有機會在自己的信仰中訓練其他人。他用一個縮寫來解釋這個過程：I-N-F-L-U-E-N-C-E。我來解釋一下他提出的九個步驟：
Intentional(刻意)。首先，我們必須要刻意投資那些上帝放在我們身邊的人。我們需要不斷地投資他們，正如使徒保羅對他的門徒提摩太一樣。 CBMC發展了「提摩太行動」教材做為促進他人精神成長的優秀工具。在提摩太後書2章2節中，保羅寫道：「你在許多見證人面前聽見我所教訓的，也要交託那忠心能教導別人的人。」
Natural(自然的)。接下來，當我們遇到這些上帝在我們人生路上放置的人時，我們必須保持自然和真實。我們不需要用聖經知識和世俗成就來打動他們，而是要讓他們確實感受到我們願意在他們的人生旅程中幫助他們。
Faith(信心)。我們的信仰需要明確而真實。不僅要表現出對基督的信心，還要對我們所指導的人表現出信心。我們應該「期待每個人表現出自己最好的一面」，當我們相信並投資在那些真正認真在基督裡成長的人時，上帝肯定會帶來最好的。
Listening(聆聽)。我們必須發展聆聽的技巧，以獲得和這些人交談的權利。從某種意義上說，這些人是上帝放在我們生活中的「學生」，來幫助我們完成一個充滿「許多危險、辛勞和陷阱」的旅程，正如讚美詩「奇異恩典」所表達的那樣。
Understand (了解)。我們指導的每個人都是獨一無二的，我們必須設法了解他們以及他們的旅程。由於我們所有人的經驗截然不同，因此「千篇一律」的做法是沒有辦法適用在每個人身上。
Encouragement(鼓勵)。年輕人需要很多鼓勵才能克服許多障礙，充分發揮耶穌基督追隨者的潛力。希伯來書10章24-25節告訴我們：「又要彼此相顧，激發愛心，勉勵行善。你們不可停止聚會，好像那些停止慣了的人，倒要彼此勸勉，既知道（原文是看見）那日子臨近，就更當如此。」
Navigate(導航)。我們還必須透過他們人生的轉折帶領他們，甚至作為他們的指南針引導他們走在正確的道路上，以防止他們被不敬虔的影響所牽制。
Concern(關懷)。對他們的幸福表現出持續的關心是很重要的。他們會看到，也會經歷我們對他們在基督裡的成長旅程中不間斷的關懷。尤其是在旅程的早期，他們會在許多問題上掙扎。就像在帖撒羅尼迦前書2章7-8節中，使徒保羅寫道：「只在你們中間存心溫柔，如同母親乳養自己的孩子。我們既是這樣愛你們，不但願意將 神的福音給你們，連自己的性命也願意給你們，因你們是我們所疼愛的。」
Enthusiasm(熱情)。他們必須在我們所說和所做的一切中看見我們的熱情。如果我們不能對自己和基督的關係感到興奮，那麼我們可能還沒準備好指導那些真正想要了解基督的新門徒。因為這個訓練過程需要我們投入認真和熱情。
反省與問題討論 在你的職涯和生命領域方面，誰對你具有正面影響力？他們是如何發揮這種影響力的？ 文章中引用的九個原則中哪一個對你來說最重要？解釋你的答案。 為什麼你認為傾聽是能有效影響他人的原則？ 為什麼「關懷」被列為影響人們的重要關鍵？在你看來，這些重要嗎？即使指導者沒有足夠的知識和專業知識？
注意：如果您想看聖經中關於此主題的其他內容，請閱讀參考下面的段落：
馬太福音28章18-19節
28:18 耶穌進前來，對他們說：「天上地下所有的權柄都賜給我了。
28:19 所以，你們要去，使萬民作我的門徒，奉父、子、聖靈的名給他們施洗（或譯：給他們施洗，歸於父、子、聖靈的名）。
以弗所書4章14-16節
4:14 使我們不再作小孩子，中了人的詭計和欺騙的法術，被一切異教之風搖動，飄來飄去，就隨從各樣的異端；
4:15 惟用愛心說誠實話，凡事長進，連於元首基督，
4:16 全身都靠他聯絡得合式，百節各按各職，照著各體的功用彼此相助，便叫身體漸漸增長，在愛中建立自己。
歌羅西書1章9-12節
1:9 因此，我們自從聽見的日子，也就為你們不住地禱告祈求，願你們在一切屬靈的智慧悟性上，滿心知道 神的旨意；
1:10 好叫你們行事為人對得起主，凡事蒙他喜悅，在一切善事上結果子，漸漸地多知道 神；
1:11 照他榮耀的權能，得以在各樣的力上加力，好叫你們凡事歡歡喜喜地忍耐寬容；
1:12 又感謝父，叫我們能與眾聖徒在光明中同得基業。
帖撒羅尼迦後書1章3-4節
1:3 弟兄們，我們該為你們常常感謝 神，這本是合宜的；因你們的信心格外增長，並且你們眾人彼此相愛的心也都充足。
1:4 甚至我們在 神的各教會裏為你們誇口，都因你們在所受的一切逼迫患難中，仍舊存忍耐和信心。
彼得後書3章17-18節
3:17 親愛的弟兄啊，你們既然預先知道這事，就當防備，恐怕被惡人的錯謬誘惑，就從自己堅固的地步上墜落。
3:18 你們卻要在我們主─救主耶穌基督的恩典和知識上有長進。願榮耀歸給他，從今直到永遠。阿們！
BEING A PERSON OF POSITIVE INFLUENCE
By Jim Langley
Several years ago I attended a CBMC conference where the keynote speaker was Dr. Tim Elmore, a best-selling author, international speaker, and president and founder of Growing Leaders, a non-profit that helps emerging leaders, with the belief that each person is born with leadership qualities. Elmore offered nine principles he considers critical in the mentoring process, concepts we should all consider as we disciple younger men and women in the faith. He started with an acronym to explain this process: I-N-F-L-U-E-N-C-E. I would like to briefly review each step in his list as he explained it:
First, we must make an Intentional investment in the lives of those God places under our tutelage. We need to continually make deposits into their lives, just as the apostle Paul did with his protégé Timothy. CBMC has developed “Operation Timothy” as an excellent tool for fostering spiritual growth in others. In 2 Timothy 2:2, Paul wrote, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.”
Next, we must be Natural and authentic in our approach as we meet with those God places in our path. We do not need to impress them with our biblical knowledge and worldly accomplishments. They do need to sense our willingness to help them as they advance in their life journey.
Our Faith needs to be evident and real. We must not only demonstrate our faith in Christ, but also show faith in those we are mentoring. We should "expect the best" from each person and trust God will surely bring out the best as we invest in those who are truly serious about growing in Christ.
We must develop our Listening skills to earn the right to speak to them. In a sense, younger men and women are “students” God has placed in our lives to assist in a journey filled with "many dangers, toils and snares," as the hymn, “Amazing Grace,” expresses it.
Each person we mentor is unique and we must seek to Understand them and where their journey has taken them. Since God has made us all distinctly different with very different experiences, a “cookie cutter” approach cannot work effectively with every person.
They will need much Encouragement to overcome many obstacles that can prevent them from realizing their full potential as followers of Jesus Christ. Hebrews 10:24-25 tells us to “consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds…let us encourage one another.”
We must also Navigate them through the twists and turns of their journey, sometimes even serving as their compass to guide them on the right path and keep them from becoming sidetracked by ungodly influences.
It is critical to demonstrate a consistent Concern for their well-being. They must see and experience our constant care for their growth in Christ, being available as they will struggle with many issues, especially early in their journey. In 1 Thessalonians 2:7-8, the apostle Paul writes of being “gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.”
They need to see our Enthusiasm in all we say and do. If we cannot be excited about our relationship with Christ, then we probably are not properly prepared for mentoring of a new disciple who truly wants to know Christ intimately. The discipling process needs to be taken both seriously and enthusiastically.
© 2018, all rights reserved. Jim Langley has been writing for more than 30 years while working as a life and health insurance agent. His passion is to write about his personal relationship with God. His goal is to encourage others to draw near to Him. A long-time member of CBMC, he started writing “Fourth Quarter Strategies” in 2014.
Reflection/Discussion Questions
Who has been the person (or persons) to have influenced you most to this point in life, both professionally and spiritually? How have they exerted that influence? Which of the nine points cited to describe how we can influence others seems most important to you? Explain your answer. Why do you think Listening is mentioned as an important aspect of effectively influencing others? Care and concern are listed as critical elements of the process of influencing people in mentoring or discipling relationships? Why, in your view, are these important – aren”t possessing knowledge and expertise enough?
NOTE: If you would like to consider other things the Bible says about this topic, read and reflect on the following passages: Matthew 28:18-19; Ephesians 4:14-16; Colossians 1:9-12; 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4; 2 Peter 3:17-18
