認罪對靈魂有好處
ABy: Rick Boxx
大部份有經驗的講員都了解,把自己個人的失敗告訴聽眾可以拉近與聽眾的關係。唯一的問題是真的那樣做需要謙卑和某種程度的坦白,而這是許多人不願做的。這就是為何當我聽到企普.應格藍(Chip Ingram)在我們所主辦的「誠信資源中心Faith Incorporated」活動中演講時令我深受感動的原因。
談到個人正直誠信的重要性時,應格藍向聽眾承認一些他個人的缺失。他不僅談到許久以前的事件,也談到一些最近讓他羞於承認的事。許多聽眾驚訝於他的開放與坦率,因為他把自己隱密的事告訴一群陌生人。
應格藍誠摯地透露自己的事不僅顯示他的光明正大,也非常有教育性。當他談論自己的故事,用自己的失敗去說明它所強調的正直,是提供一個鮮明的謙卑範例給那聚會中的每一個人。同時也鼓勵聽眾去做真誠的人,而不要躲在虛有其表的假象後面。
在工商界,我們常努力使自己好的一面呈現在別人面前。我們一向把自己的過錯與失敗隱藏起來。然而應格藍所做的是應用了一個重要的聖經原則。箴言28章13節教導我們:「遮掩自己罪過的,必不亨通;承認離棄罪過的,必蒙憐恤。」
應格藍希望他的坦白能讓他感受到從上帝和聽眾來的憐憫。對我而言,他的敘述讓我了解我自己也有許多過錯,所以我無權向別人丟石頭或論斷別人。
當然,有許多原因使我們不願告訴別人我們個人的缺點和過錯:例如覺得難堪及羞愧,但可能驕傲是最大的障礙。我們不願別人知道我們的不完美--雖然我們知道每個人都不完美。然而,驕傲驅使我們想向別人證明我們比我們真實的情況好。
這可幫助我們去思考聖經對我們的兩個勸告。第一個是簡單但嚴肅的宣告:「沒有義人,連一個也沒有」(羅馬書3章10節)。第二個是在舊約中的智慧書:「敗壞之先,人心驕傲;尊榮以前,必有謙卑」(箴言18章12節)。
我自己的經驗已使我學到最好是聽從聖經的勸告。若你在工作中犯了一個過錯,不要想隱瞞。認錯雖然似乎很困難,但常常是最好的做法。
我們所犯的錯常常以令我們困窘的方式顯露出來,有時甚至在最不恰當的時刻顯露。所以採取主動反而是智慧的,在適當的時機以坦白的態度承認過犯,而不要等我們的過犯被別人以羞辱的方式顯露出來。
本文版權為正直資源中心(Integrity Resource Center, Inc.)所有。本文獲得授權改編自「瑞克.博克思的正直時刻Integrity Moments with Rich Boxx」。這系列的文章是以一個基督徒的觀點評論職場的正直議題。想要更多了解正直資源中心或想要收到電子文件的「瑞克每天的正直時刻Rick”s daily Integrity Moments」系列文章,請上網www.integrityresource.org
思想 / 討論題目
你是否聽過一位講員(或你們機構的領袖)坦白地承認他個人或專業上的錯誤,如同本文作者所描述?若是,你聽了他的認錯後有何感覺? 你認為你自己能夠像他那樣誠實地承認自己的過錯嗎?為什麼? 隱瞞個人的缺失對一個人的正直品格有何影響?若你聽到一位領袖或講員承認他所犯的錯,你會尊敬或輕看他?請解釋。 本文說不願誠實地承認過犯的主要原因是驕傲。你是否同意?
註:若你有聖經且想要看有關此主題的其他經文,請看:
箴言11章2節,12章17節,12章19節,14章5節,15章33節,16章19節,22章4節,29章23節;雅各書5章16節
CONFESSION: GOOD FOR EVERYONE”S SOUL
By: Rick Boxx
Most experienced speakers understand communicating some of their personal failures can be endearing to an audience. The only problem is that to actually do that requires humility and transparency at a level where many people are unwilling to go. That is why I was so impressed in listening to Chip Ingram’s talk at a "Faith Incorporated" event we conducted in our city.
Speaking about the importance of personal integrity, Ingram confessed some of his personal shortcomings to his audience. He did not just reflect on incidents from the distant past, but also on some recent circumstances that he admittedly was not proud to acknowledge. Many of the listeners were surprised by his openness and candor as he confided to what was essentially a group of strangers.
Ingram”s sincere revelations were not only transparent, but also very instructive. As he told his story, citing his own failings to illustrate his focus on integrity, he did so in a way that served to provide a vivid example of humility for everyone in the meeting room. At the same time, it seemed as if he was granting his hearers permission to be genuine themselves, rather than hiding behind facades of pretense.
In the business world, we often strive to impress others by always attempting to cast ourselves in the most favorable light. We prefer to keep our personal sins and failures hidden in the shadows. What Ingram was doing, however, was applying an important biblical principle. Proverbs 28:13 teaches, "He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy."
Hopefully for Ingram, his openness enabled him to feel mercy from God as well as from the crowd. I know that for me, his account caused me to realize I have many failings of my own and have no room to cast stones or pronounce judgment on others.
Of course, there are many reasons for being reluctant to share our personal shortcomings and failures with others: embarrassment and shame are among them, but pride is perhaps the greatest inhibitor of all. We do not want other people to know our imperfections – despite our awareness that everyone is far from perfect. Nevertheless, pride drives us to try to prove to others that we are better than we really are.
It might help to consider two important admonitions we have from the Bible. The first is a simple but sobering declaration: “There is no one righteous, not even one” (Romans 3:10). The second also is found in the Old Testament book of wisdom: “Before his downfall a man”s heart is proud, but humility comes before honor” (Proverbs 18:12).
My own experience has taught me that we would be well-advised to heed this counsel from the Scriptures. If you have committed a personal sin at work, do not attempt to hide it. As difficult as it might seem, confession is usually the best course of action.
The wrongs we commit have an annoying way of revealing themselves, sometimes at the most inopportune moments. It might be wise to take a proactive approach, confessing failings candidly and in a timely manner, rather than waiting for them to be revealed in some other way – much to our disgrace.
Copyright 2010, Integrity Resource Center, Inc. Adapted with permission from "Integrity Moments with Rick Boxx," a commentary on issues of integrity in the workplace from a Christian perspective. To learn more about Integrity Resource Center or to sign up for Rick”s daily Integrity Moments, visit www.integrityresource.org.
Reflection/Discussion Questions
Have you ever heard a speaker – or a leader of your organization – candidly admit personal or professional failings, as did the man that Rick Boxx describes? If so, how did hearing those revelations make you feel? Do you think you would be able to be as honest in admitting to your own failures? Why or why not? What impact does the concealing of one”s shortcomings have on that individual”s integrity, in your opinion? If you heard a leader or speaker confess about wrongs he had done, would your view of that person of that be raised or lowered? Explain your answer. It is stated that one of the major reasons for the unwillingness to be open and honest about failures is pride. Do you agree?
NOTE: If you have a Bible and would like to read more about this subject, consider the following passages:
Proverbs 11:2, 12:17, 12:19, 14:5, 15:33, 16:19, 22:4, 29:23: James 5:16